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Wednesday, June 26, 2013

A Knight of the Cosmic Laire. Ye Gads! What an Honour!

Ye olde aloha,

 (He rides into the town square, the hooves of his huge, white horse click-clacking off the dome-shaped cobblestones. Jumping from the sweating steed, he gathers the waiting townsfolk around him.)

“Greetings to you, my Lords, Ladies, squires, fair maidens, serfs – and Gary.
I stand before you, aye, a little taller today, the recipient of a new honour...”
...He pauses to snap his fingers.
Eight manly men in brown tights and powdered wigs break rank from the crowd and form a 16th century version of ye flashe mob.
Using those long, trumpet things with banner ads hanging down (the only one he can read is for White Castle) the musicians play a wee melody of something triumphant-sounding.
He holds up one bejeweled hand – then lowers it to power off ye new tablet. The empty hand rises again. The trumpeters trumpet no more and slither back into the crowd - as if they were never there!

“Ye friends, I am now a Knight of the Cosmic Table.”

He waves down a smattering round of applause from the open windows of Cavanaugh's Tavern.

“Sir David Powers King himself bestowed this honour upon me during this past week of the Summer Solstice.
Now, I must impeach upon you my desire that ye please visit Sir David's Cosmic Laire to hear tell a mighty interview between his Sir-ness and I upon the ceremonious announcement of my Knighting.”
(Jumps back on weary steed, who looks up as if to say, my gosh, Sir Chunky, I hope we’re going to Subway.)

“Hi-Ho, Zinc Silver! Away!”

David Powers King


"Sir" David Powers King will release his debut novel, WOVEN, with Michael R. Jensen, Oct. 8, 2013 by Cedar Fort / SweetWater Press.


Nick Wilford said...

Noble sir, this hilarious yarn demonstrates beyond doubt why you are more than worthy of such a high honour. Congrats and can't wait for the interview - it will be epic!

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

Congratulations, Sir Mark! Will read it when it posts.

Heather M. Gardner said...

Awesome post!

Best of luck!


Pearl said...

You are a funny man, aren't you?



Pearl said...

Oh, and congratulations!

Melissa said...

Congratulations, Maxi Mark!

And WOOT for DPK!!! :D

Meradeth Houston said...

Congrats good sir! (And hope the Subway was tasty!)

Johanna Garth said...

I raise my glass of ale in honor to you good Sir! :)

Al Diaz said...

Congratulations for that knighthood, Sir Mark! All tables need a humorous knight. :D

Elizabeth Seckman said...

Sir Brother, ye are of noble quality. Sir David is wise to recognize.

Sheena-kay Graham said...

You make everything humorous Ark. Congrats on your knighthood.

~Sia McKye~ said...

Impeach upon? You're removing Sir David? lol! Cute, sir chunky. Congrats on the award.

Now I'm off to eat my peach. Yum


S.P. Bowers said...

You know you've made it when men in tights and powdered wigs for a flash mob for you. Congrats!

Tyrean Martinson said...

Noble and gallant sir, I thank thee for always making me laugh boisterously when I visit (or make me think and tear up depending on the post).

Congrats on your Knighthood!

Ella said...

Yes, YOU are on your way to meeting the Queen soon! Knighthood so suits you~ YOUR honorable sir, I envy you seeing a flash mob of men in tights-lol

Congrats to you and now I'll pony off to visit Sir David!

Cheers! ;D

Stephen Tremp said...

Be perfectly still when being Knighted. Its a great way to lose your head. No sneezing!

Mark Means said...

Hail and well met, Sir Koopmans!!!

Hehe, congrats on your new knighthood and keep that armor polished! :D

Morgan said...

Looooved the interview. It was SO entertaining!

Mark said...

Congrats! :)

Samantha May said...

You, sir, are hilarious!

Something about Ye Olde Aloha doesn't seem quite...correct :D

Elise Fallson said...

Congratulations Sir Koopmans!
Ahem--do I curtsey or bow? High 5, fist bump? Chest bump? ... um ... well maybe not that one. :P

LD Masterson said...

I am honored to be able to leave my humble comment on the blog of an esteemed member of such an august group of noble and...um...what was I going to say again?

Tammy Theriault said...

May I be your nearest dearest jester sir Mark??? Great entry!! I've stabled the horse for you

Unknown said...

It was a very fun interview!

klahanie said...

Sir Mazza dude n' stuff,

I was 'serfing' my chainmails, ah, my emails and I noticed an alert to drop on by thine posting, kind sire.

First of all, congratulations on spelling in correct English. An honour to note that. And to thinketh that thy honourable self has become a Knight of the Comic, sorry, Cosmic Table. Sir, I tip my cap to you. Sir David is worthy of a visit, me thinketh.

Congrats to Sir David upon the release of his debut novel. I assume it's being released from a dungeon.

Sir Mazza, a fine story thine doth tell. And the link to this humble peasant is duly noted.

You have remindeth me of this, if I can take such liberty as to leave my musing.

Sir Galahad and Sir Lancelot walked into 'Yee Olde Inn'. "My good innkeeper. We require a room for two knights.", said Sir Lancelot. "That is fine. You can pay for your lodgings upon your departure." replied the innkeeper. The next morning, Sir Galahad and Sir Lancelot, approached the innkeeper. "My good man" said Sir Galahad, "we wish to pay for our lodgings." Looking rather perplexed, the innkeeper responded, "Oh, I thought you wanted a room for two nights?"

And with that, I bid thee goodnight.

Gary :)

Unknown said...

I'll second Stephen's advice ;)

The Words Crafter said...

Hear! Hear! I hoist a pint in your honor, good sir!

I'll head over and 'read all about it.'

Anonymous said...

Sweet congrats!

David P. King said...

Indeed, it T'was an honour having you, Sir Mark! Thank for allowing me to interview your awesomeness. :)

dolorah said...

Congrats Mark, what an honor :) I'll head off to read it soon as I find my noble steed (read: donkey) to carry me off the the adventure.


Bonnee Crawford said...

Congrats! :) I'll have to pop over to Sir David's cosmic laire to check out the interview.

Nice horse.

Michael Di Gesu said...

Sir, Mark,

CONGRATS AGAIN on your Knighthood! Such a wonderful group around our table. The talent is ENDLESS!

WE Lords and Ladies of the Cosmic Table bow to you! We certainly can use a good laugh and your are certainly the knight to always keep us amused. Hopefully we can do the same for you.

ALL the best!

Sir Michael

cleemckenzie said...

So now we have to bow and call you Sir? Isn't that suit a tad warm for beach wear? I'm worried about heat stroke, but then that's because I'm a mom, and once you're one of those, you're always one of those.

Enjoy your Kinightdom.

Chancelet said...

Very good show! May you have a great success. Writer’s Mark

Optimistic Existentialist said...

Congratulations Mark!! This is awesome. I love the wittiness that you incporporate into your writing!!

Lynda R Young as Elle Cardy said...

Hail, o mighty knight.

Nicole said...

Huzzah, good knight. Huzzah! ;)

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